There are ways to scale up our political process in Fremont – here’s how. Given the progressive direction of negative campaigning that bruises egos and reputations and denies the public of real strategies that set policy, a better way is possible. The cost of mailers probably approaches $100,000. With two candidates that’s $200,000. The wholesale cost of a 15-gallon tree ready to plant is about $60. That means you can plant around 3,333 trees if the negative campaigning money is spent on Fremont’s canopy. That’s easy.
The fun part is the mudslinging contest! An appropriate piece of open land, with good water supply, must be selected by impartial members of City management (is that possible?). Then the candidates must stand at a 15-yard distance as their campaign managers hand them soft mud balls. Let the mud slinging begin. Once it is finished each candidate must gather his received mud balls and insert acorns from the tree of his choice. He or she will then need to toss their mudballs in an appropriate location in the confines of our fair city. I suggest the East Bay Regional Park District but others may have a better location. Please not next to our sewer infested bay or the protected wetlands.
It may take years, but we will know eventually which candidate has achieved the best environmental goals. My take on this year’s candidates is that they are all outstanding individuals that for unknown reasons have chosen a poorly paid and difficult job, and that they spend lots of money to arrive at this demanding position. Their details of how they will function with city management are hard to discern based on their mailings, so this is an alternative for the years ahead that we can all enjoy.
Richard Godfrey
Local Fremont Mud Salesman
